A DAY IN THE LIFE OF CHIROPRACTOR BERNARD PRESTON
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(Keywords: A DAY IN THE LIFE OF CHIROPRACTOR BERNARD PRESTON, Interesting facts about Strawberries, Benefits of Cycling, Low back exercises, Chiropractic Coalface, Hummus, Nutritional value of Mushrooms )
Only to be read if you are very bored! Folk keep asking me what do I actually do? what do I eat? how much do I exercise...? So, if you are exceedingly bored... a day in the life of Bernard Preston! Saturday, 22 May 2010, to be precise. You really want to know? Single minded and unconventional, quite unselfconscious and she-who-must-be-obeyed would tell you often maddeningly exasperating!
4am It's nearly midsummer in Holland and already the blackbirds are disturbing the peace, what a beautiful sound... it's my wake-up call. I start the day dreamily, still half asleep, doing my back exercises, they take only two-three minutes, and I NEVER miss them. My back will immediately start creaking if I do... one of the little disciplines that saves me (and could save you) a lot of pain. You can get the very basic ones from a series of emails called Chiropractic Tips at CHIROPRACTIC-HELP.COM. They're free... More advanced pelvic stabilisation exercises require careful teaching and monitoring. Ask your chiropractor...
CHIROPRACTIC TIPS ...
Bed prayers may be dead prayers but I always spend ten minutes thanking the good Lord that I have yet another day to enjoy on the planet. I base it on the disciples' prayer, remembering friends and family, and the odd patient in grave difficulty. Like a woman who two weeks ago had both breasts amputated - from taking hormones in the menopause. Madness on the part of her doctor who assured her there was no danger...
Onze Vader in de hemel
Wij eren uw heilige naam.
Laat uw koninkrijk spoedig komen
Laat uw wil op de aarde worden gedaan.
Geef ons vandaag onze eten.
Vergeef ons onze zonden, net zoals wij anderen vergeven.
Laat ons niet in verleiding komen, en verlos ons van de kwade machten.
Het koninkrijk is van u, de kracht en de glorie, tot alle eeuwigheid.
Amen.
Recognise it? This is where I cut my teeth on the Dutch grammar.
A DAY IN THE LIFE OF CHIROPRACTOR BERNARD PRESTON At "may Thy Kingdom come" I find myself praying that my granddaughters, only 1 and 3, will one day become fully fledged citizens of the Kingdom of Jesus. Crazy, but I whispered a little prayer for their spouses-to-be. I wonder if I'll ever meet them! I also added a prayer for Pope Benedict, the only person who can change the wave of Catholic Sex Abuse scandals that is sweeping the Church. A married priesthood? Perhaps the ordination of Roman Catholic Womanpriest Longithano (sp?) yesterday in Rome is the first crack in the papal woodwork since Pope Hildebrand committed the great heresy in 1024 by excommunicating all married priests.
CATHOLIC SEX ABUSE ...
Zimbabwe was also there in my thoughts and prayers. Lord have mercy...
04.30 am EARLY MORNING TEA
A DAY IN THE LIFE OF CHIROPRACTOR BERNARD PRESTONI always start the day with a litre of weak black tea to which I add a little fruit. Grapefruit this morning. I refuse to drink tea-bag tea, it taste so terrible, so it's loose Ceylon tea for me. If you really like tea, make the change; you'll be astonished at the difference. It really is worth it despite the schlep of tea-leaves. A lot cheaper too.
And thence to the computer, mug in hand, check the emails, reply to a few of your queries at Chiropractic-Help.com and on to the last edit of my next book, Stones in my Clog. My editor likes the book but she wants a few changes in Ch 20. The Blood stone, a story about a blood-diamond merchant, a patient of mine. Well, no longer, Camile was murdered...
The final editing of the manuscript is done. You can read a few snippets at Stones in my Clog... and for a measly $2.99 you can download it as a pdf and read it in the bath!
STONES IN MY CLOG
07.00 am BREAKFAST
A DAY IN THE LIFE OF CHIROPRACTOR BERNARD PRESTONShe who must be obeyed is calling for tea, and I join her in bed with my breakfast. Muesli containing oats, corn, barley, rye and wheat flakes, dried fruit, honey, soya lecithin, linseed... We like it sweeter so we add a spoon of raisins instead of sugar and a handful of nuts. Always walnuts in Holland, and I like a few hazelnuts and almonds too. Then there are 4-5 fresh strawberries; researchers promise me strawberries will save my eyesight, and reduce the chances of me getting cancer and arthritis... I hope so!
INTERESTING FACTS ABOUT STRAWBERRIES ...
I find I'm famished by 11am at the Chiropractic Coalface if I don't have a little protein, so this morning I add a good spoonful of hummus. Helen thinks I'm crazy, and turns up her nose at the smell of the garlic... yes, the odd patient does complain!
Hummus: GROWING CHICKPEAS ... it stays with you all morning.
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"If a man does not keep pace with his companions,
perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer.
Let him step to the music which he hears,
however measured or far away."
HENRY THOREAU
"This above all: to thine own self be true.
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man."
The bard. Hamlet.
Top it with a good dollop of thick Dutch yoghurt, and I'm all set for the morning. It's going to be stressful... Tip: If muesli gives you indigestion, first soak it in boiling water for half an hour... and maybe even nuke it for one minute. After a quick shower, I cycle to the clinic, it's only three minutes, I have no intention of wasting my life, short as it is, sitting and fuming in traffic!
08.00 The CHIROPRACTIC COALFACE
A DAY IN THE LIFE OF CHIROPRACTOR BERNARD PRESTON8.00 Mrs S is doing fine. She first consulted me about a year ago with chronic bridge of the foot pain. An orthopaedic surgeon told her it was arthritis, and there's nothing to be done. She must live with the pain. What nonsense! She does have a bit of arthritis, true, but the cause of the pain is a cuboid subluxation, not the arthritis. Otherwise she wouldn't have responded the way she has. She reported that wearing a clog in theatre (she's a nursing sister) gave her pain for one day, but the next day, in a normal shoe, she was fine again. Imagine that! Any other country in the world where you might go into theatre in clogs. They don't like getting blood on their own shoes and the special shoe covers are too slippery...
ANKLE JOINT PAIN ...
8.10 Mr S (Mrs S's husband) has had no low back or neck pain, what brought him to me, but he has started getting right (jaw joint) TMJ ear pain. It's causing pain on the side of his face, and migraines. We'll fix it.
TMJ ear pain ...
They come regularly every six weeks and are heartbroken - I broke the news that I'm retiring to South Africa in three months time. It's going to be hard for me too... 8.20 Miss P, a 28-year old young attorney insists on only coming for a consultation when she has pain. Right sacroiliac joint treatment is needed again, and she too tells me she has pain in her ear. The ENT specialist told her it's her jaw joint. A routine exam and, yes, I agree. Drat, I missed it, or she never told me; it's been painful for over two years.
SACROILIAC JOINT TREATMENT ...
8.30 Mr P is a butcher in town. He brings me a CD with some photos of healthy hyaline cartilage from a young pig. That pleases me, I can use them on what I call the second-most important page at Chiropractic-Help. I treat him for a carpal tunnel syndrome that's doing fine. It's not cured but it's not waking him at night any more. 80% better he said. Chiropractic doesn't always help with CTS, but it usually does. The Median nerve is being irritated as it passes between the two heads of a muscle in his forearm.
CARPAL TUNNEL CASE FILE ...
HYALINE CARTILAGE ...
8.40 Mr T is doing fine. He first consulted me six months ago, looking like the learning tower of Pisa. He's doing the rehab exercises faithfully, and I upgraded him to Pelvic Stabilisation, level 3, and we agreed to extend the time between consultations to 7 weeks. He irritates me. He likes to park his bright red Ferrari just outside the clinic where he knows I can see it! The Netherlands is a wealthy well-run country with only 6% unemployment, and it's dropping according to the latest figures.
POSTERO LATERAL DISK HERNIATION ...
8.50 Catch up time. I treat 5 patients per hour, and usually need the extra ten minutes for the unexpected. Miss P's TMJ. I take in a deep breath, and turn on Classic FM, the best internet radio station in the whole world! A DAY IN THE LIFE OF CHIROPRACTOR BERNARD PRESTON
ClassicFM ...
9.00 Mr N's sciatica is fine. For years I didn't think Chiropractic could help a patient who had ONLY leg pain, with no back pain, but I was wrong. I've now got it figured...
LEG PAIN SCIATICA ...
But the frozen shoulder that he has suffered with for three years is only 25% better after ten treatments (same time as his leg pain sciatica) so I recommend he consult my colleague for a second opinion.
FROZEN SHOULDER ...
9.10 Mr P has one of the worst degenerative backs and necks I have ever treated. At 53 he's been laid off work, permanently disabled, and actually is doing far better with Chiropractic than expected. I don't adjust his neck, he didn't respond well, and use a mobilising technique, and gentle "Thompson drops" on his low back. He's very happy, and comes once a month for maintenance. He's very faithful about the rehab exercises. He confirms they make an enormous difference.
DEGENERATIVE LUMBAR DISC DISEASE CASEFILE ...
9.20 Mrs B, the above patient's daughter is 29-year old. She's had severe midthoracic pain that radiates around the ribcage to her breast-bone for two years, despite various medical treatments. Her father convinced her to come - fortunately she doesn't have the scoliosis and the degeneration that Papa has. She was a new patient about a month ago and is doing very well. Careful examination revealed a condition called Tietzes syndrome casefile.
TIETZES SYNDROME CaseFile ...
9.30 Mrs T still has some pain in her ankle. Of course but, considering the seriousness of the injury, she's very pleased. It had given her beans for eleven years since that nasty fall down a Dutch staircase. A whole year in a cast, on and off, three months in a special traction brace, four operations... The orthopod told her there was nothing more to be done, and she has to learn to live with the pain. What nonsense! She's just spent a whole day on her feet an amusement park, De Efteling. That should couldn't do three months ago. She couldn't even put her heel on the ground.
ANKLE JOINT PAIN CaseFile ...
9.40 Mrs B is a stunningly beautiful, tall young woman who has been consulting me for four years. She dresses like a model. Very handsome! She has a difficult low back and it's far from perfect, but she can function, the pain in her leg has ceased completely and the Slump Test for a pinched nerve is negative.
SLUMP TEST ...
Her father's had three back ops and she's trying desperately to avoid that road. We're winning. She has little pain for about three weeks after each treatment, and then it starts nagging again. She comes once a month for maintenance. A 5mm heel lift has helped for her leg length inequality (short leg). I only adjust her pelvis.
LOWER BACK SURGERY ...
LEG LENGTH INEQUALITY ...
9.50 Catch up time. My secretary brings me an "op-peppertje" (pick-me-up), a strong coffee and an "emmertje" (little bucket) of water. I take a gulp of each. 10.00 Mr T is a new patient. A chronic low back pain, lumbar facet syndrome case. Run of the mill stuff, but he's worried. This is the first time he's had an ache running down both legs. Perhaps it's going to be more difficult... a lumbar stenosis case?
LUMBAR FACET SYNDROME ...
LUMBAR STENOSIS CaseFile ...
10.40 Mrs N consulted me with a routine sacroiliac joint syndrome
SACROILIAC JOINT ...
about a month ago. On examination it became immediately obvious that she was having significant groin pain. Then the jackpot: "This is a hereditary problem, Mrs N. Has your mother had a hip replacement?" "Oh yes, and can you also help my ten-year old son? His hip collapses under him, and he can't get out of bed sometimes because it's so painful. The orthopaedic surgeon can't find anything wrong." 10.50 Mrs N's son, Simon. The ranges of motion of his hips are grossly increased and painful. The treatment is painful. I don't like inflicting pain, but there's no way around this. "Zachte heelmeesters maken stinkende wonden." Overly gentle doctors make stinking wounds. No pain, no gain. It's not always true, but it certainly is sometimes. The lad has a mild dose of Developmental Hip Dysplasia.
DEVELOPMENTAL HIP DYSPLASIA ignore it and it's certain hip arthritis.
HIP ARTHRITIS ...
A DAY IN THE LIFE OF CHIROPRACTOR BERNARD PRESTON 11.00 Mrs P had a severe slipped disc two weeks ago, barely able to walk. She's doing magically well, in the circumstances, Slump test is negative and the pain in her leg is all but gone. Now she wants me to look at her neck... she's accompanied by her dentist husband. He wants to know what it's all about... it takes time, and I'm running late. 20 minutes. Drat.
SLIPPED DISK ...
11.30 Baby Ghislain is doing fine, though she's nearly a year now. She doesn't like me anymore, and thinks the "activator" has a sharp needle! And she let the whole clinic know. But she sleeps through the night so her mother likes me! It was a very different story six months ago when she brought her beautiful child in for Colic Chiropractic. The next consultation will be in three months. If all goes well, the next will be six months later. Her mother is a little concerned about her foot, but I can't find anything wrong...
COLIC CHIROPRACTIC ...
11.40 Mrs T has a horrible neck and back. Advanced arthritis. Her degenerative low back responds very well to Chiropractic, but her neck not. It creaks alarmingly for a woman of only 54, so I use a technique called Snags that I learnt from a Manipulative Therapist. They use our techniques, so why shouldn't I steal some of theirs! For Mrs T's neck it's better than the Chiropractic adjustment. My colleagues may burn me at the stake!
DEGENERATIVE LUMBAR DISC DISEASE CaseFile ...
11.50 I'm hoping to catch up, but no, it's a further ten minutes behind. My secretary tells me anxiously that there's a new patient scheduled for 11.40, a girl of 10 with (so the schedule says: a heel spur.) Never heard of heel spur in a child before. I don't believe it. "Tell her father I should be ready for them by 12.10. My next patient is Mrs T's daughter. She just back from honeymoon and no patient to play catch-up on. Fortunately her headaches, from a Cervical Facet syndrome, is doing well, but still with all the chit chat, I'm running over 30 minutes behind.
CERVICAL FACET SYNDROME ...
12.10 I hurry the young woman out of my consulting room, only to find an empty waiting room. The irate man has left. Oh well, it was only a "kennismakingsgesprek" - a No-charge service that we offer to people who aren't sure if Chiropractic is the right treatment for them. Instead of a diagnostic nightmare - I know that child doesn't have a heel spur - I'll be home for an early lunch. I'm bushed! Seventeen patients, including a new patient is more than enough on a Saturday morning for a "bejaarde" (old man!) like me.
RUNNING LATE ...
13.00 LUNCH
A DAY IN THE LIFE OF CHIROPRACTOR BERNARD PRESTONHelen has a delicious, but simple lunch waiting. A tomato, cheese and lettuce sandwich, and a third slice of bread with Moutabel Baba Ghannouj. Yum. She only uses olive oil or butter on bread; we refuse to eat margarines because they are hydrogenated foods loaded with trans-fats. And a glass of pomegranate juice.
MOUTABEL BABA GHANNOUJ ... perfect for those with raised cholesterol.
HYDROGENATED FOODS ... avoid at all costs if you value your nerves and your brain.
14.00 SNOOZE
A DAY IN THE LIFE OF CHIROPRACTOR BERNARD PRESTONMy brother has sent me a Sudoku he can't get out. It's a beast, so I prelude my snooze with half an hour of mental gymnastics. I suspect it'll take me several days. I'd be greatful for any clues! Then forty winks.
15.00 CYCLING ALONG THE RIVER MAAS
A DAY IN THE LIFE OF CHIROPRACTOR BERNARD PRESTONIt's deliciously warm. Helen and I set off on our bikes along the River Maas. Two and half glorious hours, gentle cycling, no serious stuff, sheer pleasure. This is Maastricht with the Church of our dear Lady on the skyline. A beautiful city...
18.00 SUNDOWNER TIME
A DAY IN THE LIFE OF CHIROPRACTOR BERNARD PRESTONI confess it all. Do as I say, and not as I do! It's three beers, a pile of olives and Feta cheese as a prelude to the best dinner in the world. Butternut soup, fried salmon and mushrooms. Tonight we're not having Helen's famous €15 salad. That's about five nights a week, but not tonight and, further confessions, half a 100g bar of chocolate. Wicked.
Olive Garden menu TAPENADE ...
GROWING BUTTERNUT SQUASH (Winter squash) and a Butternut soup recipe.
WAYS TO COOK SALMON ...
20.00 TELEVISIONI'm not great TV fan, but within one eye on the Dutch news and the other writing this page, I'm keeping up with all that's happening in the world. And finally watching Andrew Lloyd Webber breaking the hearts of two young girls, but we do have a brave young finalist from Over the Rainbow, don't we? Good choice, viewers. How about one last great musical, Andrew? Is Tim Rice still about? Perhaps you two could set your differences aside for the great benefit of mankind, and leave the world with just one more gem. Perhaps two. You're not over the rainbow, you know! I reckon there must be at least another half a dozen great musicals still waiting in your fertile brain to be written! After Michaelangelo didn't stop until he was over 85. And I'm not planning to either! 22.00 BED AND A BOOK. Two books, and that Sukoku. It's been a long day. I read another dozen pages of The First Lady Chatterley. I'm up to the bit when she announces to her lover, the game-keeper that she's three months pregnant with his child. Helen says it's a purely male fantasy that any woman would be enamoured if a man "pounced" on her! Only a male could have written such drivel! Well, I think D.H. Lawrence is a great writer, his dialogue is superb but even now it's still a scandalous book, written purposefully I suppose to shock. That it did, and still does. I try to read a bit from the Bible each day, and bit incongruous after Lawrence. Today it's from the gospel of John: "I tell you the truth, whoever hears my word and believes him who sent me has eternal life and will not be condemned; s/he has crossed over from death to life." (5:24) That's either true, or Jesus was the greatest con-artist to ever walk through the pages of this world. There's no in-between, is there? I'm starting to yawn, but can I find another ten minutes with that drat Sukoku? Ah, I find a triple! Column 2, Row 7 must be a 9. And finally, I'm asleep before my head hits the pillow. That folks was a fairly typical A day in the life of Chiropractor Bernard Preston. Only I didn't eat an apple today. I do most days. Slaap gerust!
APPLE DIET ... it does keep the doctor away.
MONTHLY NEWSLETTER
Chiropractic-Help.com and Bernard-Preston.com send out a joint monthly newsletter. It covers an overview of a health topic (this last month’s Issue #14 Hip and Groin pain), always a nutritional corner (Cholesterol /Statins and aching legs), and a piece from Bernard Preston. Sign up at the bottom of any Chiropractic Help Page, for example this one on NUTRITIONAL VALUE OF MUSHROOMS, rich in Selenium. Low blood Selenium increases the risk of Prostate cancer a massive five times. The newsletter is free.
NUTRITIONAL VALUE OF MUSHROOMS …
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