In the current downturn state departments have been concerned at the indecent profits being declared by the quacks. So they weighed in with a new austerity package but....
The acupuncturists completely missed the point.
The Allergists voted to scratch it, but the Dermatologists advised not to make any rash moves.
The Chiropractors had a crack at it whilst the Homoeopaths were disappointed at the diluted package.
The ENT people thought it all smelled a bit fishy and the Dietitians couldn't stomach one bit of it.
The Gastroenterologists had a sort of a gut feeling about it, but the Neurologists thought the Administration had a lot of nerve.
The Obstetricians felt they were all labouring under a misconception.
Ophthalmologists considered the idea dreadfully shortsighted.
Pathologists yelled, "Over my dead body!" while the Pediatricians said, 'Oh, grow up!'
The Physiotherapist decided they had better muscle in on the act whilst the Orthopods certainly felt that they had a bone to pick with the Minister in charge.
The Pulmonologists were left quite breathless by their audacity.
The Psychiatrists thought the whole idea quite mad, while the Radiologists said they could see right through it.
Rheumatologist were just a bit stiff about the whole affair, but the Surgeons decided to wash their hands of the whole thing.
The Internists said it was a bitter pill to swallow, and the Plastic Surgeons declared: "This puts a whole new face on the matter."
The Naturopaths felt sure that it would lead to a whole new less-pleasing lifestyle.
The Podiatrists thought on the other hand that, for them, it was a giant step forward, but the Urologists were totally pissed off at the whole idea.
The Anaesthesiologists thought the whole idea was a gas, and the Cardiologists didn't have the heart to say no.
In the end, the Proctologists won out, leaving the entire decision up to the assholes on Capitol Hill.
And in South Africa ...
Deputy Minister of Health Dr Molefi Sefularo has decided the best medicine in South Africa would be to close down all the hospitals. “We know that since the introduction of Dr Manto's beetroot treatment for HIV under the former Mbeki administration, that the incidence of nosocomial drug-resistant TB infections has soared and we have have failed to measure the extent of that problem. We don’t know how many people died from hospital-acquired infections and we are failing to measure the presence of these bugs,” he says.
NUTRITIONAL VALUE OF MUSHROOMS
Second best medicine is food that is rich in anti cancer properties, mostly the richly coloured fruits and vegetables like beetroot constipation, tomato prostate and also mushrooms - loaded with selenium and zinc and B vitamins - all with proven anti cancer properties.
Third best medicine, and best chiropractic is make sure the
HYALINE CARTILAGE
in your body is being well fed. It has no blood supply of its own, so fixations in the joint that reduce the free flow of synovial fluid in the joints causes arthritis, and quite quickly. In white mice it starts in 13 hours.
Fourth best medicine and second best chiropractic is to keep in motion. Oodles of research now showing that exercise, be it walking, cycling, swimming ... all sports have enormous benefits, and couch potatoes die a lot sooner, and suffer more pain.
If a laugh-a-minute doesn't help, try Omega-3 rich foods and delic stuff like our apple diet. That alone would make an enormous difference to your own health and your child's dyslexia for attention-deficit. Growing butternut squash and making your own easy Butternut Squash SOUP is scientifically proven stuff.
After laughter, the best medicine is to eat from a wide range of foods. Mushrooms, along with tomatoes and phytosterols, are great news for protection against the nastiest of cancers - yup, the one that strikes fear into the heart of every hot-blooded male. Prostate cancer, it goes hand in hand with... impotence. And those wives who at sixty plus who still enjoy their sex! Look after your male, give him mushrooms, tomatoes and avocados on a regular basis.
MUSHROOM SOUP RECIPES
Bernard Preston and Chiropractic Help send out a monthly newsletter. It contains a interesting condition, last month facial pain, perhaps a case history, something from the Nutritional Corner (such as the benefits of flax seed, rich in Omega 3) and a snippet from Bernard Preston's books.
Sign up at the bottom of any Chiropractic Help page, such as this one on arthritis in lower back...
ARTHRITIS IN LOWER BACK ...
Had your greens today? That's, ho-hum, something rather different! Good exercise for the lumbar spine, also helps prevent osteoarthritis! Provided you followed the foreplay rules which should include these lower back exercises.
LOWER BACK EXERCISES ...
SMOKED SALMON DIP RECIPE ...
Helens 15 euro salad ...